What Mom Taught Me

In case you missed last year's surprise Mother's Day post, here is the link.

Also: Mom. You really should change your password once in awhile...

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 Mami taught me how to have great adventures.

We have driven to Vegas together more times than I can count.
Today, I love driving and am always ready to take a road trip.

We saw the GoGo's at Mandalay Bay (outside on "the beach" - aka The Pool) and we got drenched. Afterwards, we were sitting, still dripping, and having a cafecito while watching the people who had just come from an Il Divo concert head into the casino. We couldn't stop laughing about the people being dressed to the nines while we were dripping.
I wish I could remember what was so funny about the guy we met in the elevator, but at the time it was the funniest thing we'd ever heard.
When a friend invited me to the symphony, I knew how to dress because of that dripping in Vegas moment... and I still make friends with people in elevators.

She took me to New York with her right after 9/11. We FLEW. The two towers were still burning, but we went.
When she mentioned a trip to San Antonio to cook Cuban food for our troops, I bought my ticket right away.

We have gone to Miami plenty of times for Cuba Nostalgia because she had taught me to be proud of my heritage and my culture.
When abuela asked if I would take her to Cuba to be reunited with her siblings (for the first time since fidel took over) I did not hesitate; I went to Cuba.

We have met totally famous people and been total dorks about it.
People have treated us like we're famous and we have been total dorks about it.

We saw (presidential hopeful) Mike Huckabee at the airport, but I was convinced it wasn't him. She went up and shook his hand. She was right.
We were in L.A. and I said "Mami, that's Pitbull," but she wasn't convinced it was him. We eventually shook his hand. I was right.

Mami taught me to be fearless. And to be right. ;-)

Love,

Kiki Amy

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My mom taught me to appreciate comfort.

I can remember sitting on mom's lap at Luza's old house, in the living room in the dark when she was trying to put me to sleep.  I remember sucking on her finger while she tried to rock me to sleep.  She always played with my hair to calm me down and I still run my fingers through my hair to relax now when I'm all wound up.  She would always say, "Who loves you more then anyone else in the whole wide world?"

She asked because she already knew the answer. And so do I.

Love,

Adam

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Mom taught me to be fearless.

I remember the first time I had auditioned for my first musical. I was an extremely nervous, shy and quiet person. (Hard to believe now, I know.) Before I left, my Mom told me: "Be fearless. If you are fearless... they will respect you."

Every audition I’ve had since then, I have chosen to be fearless.  All because my Mom, I am now outgoing, well-spoken, respected and trusted by my friends. Thank you Mom, for teaching me to be fearless.

I love you, Mom! And thank you for letting me live. ;-)

Love,

Jon

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My wife taught me the importance of telling stories.

When we are out at some family gathering or just out doing something fun together, she will stop and take photos or little video clips. I have to admit it used to drive me crazy.

But later when she writes about our time together or glues down the pictures in her scrapbook or tells these stories to our friends, I am grateful. She helps me slow down and see myself as part of a great story. Happy Mother's Day, honey. I love you.

Love,

Eric

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My mom taught me how to learn… and learn quickly.

Imitation was a skill I developed at a young age. And I had always believed that if mom could do it, I could do it too. My mom taught me how to bake a perfect cake (from scratch), how to do laundry (don’t mix whites with dark colors), how to sew (keep your finger away from the needle), how to clean the bathtub (it’s not a fun job, but someone’s gotta do it)...

My favorite compliment was to be called “mommy’s little helper.”

Later, she encouraged me to pursue my own interests. If I wanted to know how to do something, I had more than enough resources to learn how to do it myself.

My mom is an intensely curious, playful, thoughtful, and opinionated woman with the greatest sense of humor. She’s brave and honest and deeply connected to her culture. She had an excellent fashion sense, she makes the greatest pastelitos de guayaba, and she loves a good story.

Thanks to mom, I learned how to be a good listener, how to take care of myself, how to apologize, how to be creative, how to write, how to take a beautiful photograph and, most importantly, how to say “I love you.” and mean it.

Here’s to the best teacher I ever had. Happy mother’s day, mom! I love you so much I could spit.

Love,

Lucy

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Also, bonus picture of mom singing karaoke to Neil Diamond at the top of her lungs... on Christmas Day.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

"What About Prom?"

I have homeschooled my kids for over ten years now. I am still constantly surprised that one of the greatest concerns (right after the ignorant "socialization" question) is "What about prom?"

I sigh a little bit and carefully explain how we do high school: He actually attends a high school that offers Independent Study. His classes are mostly on-line, except for Spanish and Drama. On the days he has those classes, he is physically at a campus and interacts with his many friends. He also leads their Improv team. (See this post.)

Back to the original question: "What about prom?"

The high school independent study program sponsors a prom every spring. It's a lovely and intimate affair with maybe 100 students attending. Some of the kids take dates. Many just go with a group. It's usually held at the always fabulous and iconic Disneyland Hotel and unlike "real" high school, there is very little peer pressure to look or act a certain way - unless you count the good kind of peer pressure, but that's not important right now.

This was Jonathan's first prom. (Yes, he's wearing tails. He looks very "Downton Abbey," doesn't he?)

He did not take a date, but instead chose to go with friends. Aren't they just lovely?

He enjoyed dancing with almost all the beauties represented here. (Because, seriously, if you were a sixteen year old girl, could you resist this?)

I love that the girls were all wearing modest and flattering gowns.

I especially love that they were smart enough to know that a night of dancing would require they wear comfortable footwear. (I may or may not have been on the ground when I took this, but that's not important right now.)

Most of these kids have also been homeschooled for years. We've known them and have watched them grow up into the amazing people you see represented here. (These three were members of the cast of Willy Wonka Jr. which they performed a few years ago. What a looker Violet Beauregard grew up to be!)

I think the implication inherent in the "What about prom?" question is that surely because these kids are homeschooled they can't possible know how to act in public. They couldn't be expected to know how to dress or behave or even which fork to use for their salad.

I don't think the question is meant maliciously in any way. I just think that people sometimes make assumptions over what happens with homeschool education. Or should I say, "independent study." In this case, the emphasis should be on the independent. Most of these kids are not driven by worry of what their peers will think. They've grown up to be...well, independent.

As Jonathan was dressing for the dance, I asked, "Do you need some help?"

"No, mom. I've got this."

Yes, son. You most certainly do.

My (Super) Hero

A few months ago, my son, Jonathan (16) breathlessly runs in.

"Mom, you've got to see this!" He then proceeds to show me the following movie trailer:

Explosions! People in peril! ! MARVEL SUPERHEROES ! ! (Win.Win.WIN!)

He knows (because I've told him repeatedly, as I have all four of my kids) that I was a nerdy comic-book-loving kid. That's right. Little known fun fact.

{WARNING: Over-sharing-Uber-nerd Alert!}

My dad used to take me to the local drugstore on weekends and let me pick out 3 or 4 comic books every week. It's how I learned to read in English. This probably flies in the face of all kinds of English as a second language research, but, whatever....

I would very carefully choose a variety of comic books, from the Harvey classics, like Richie Rich to the "teen" comedy, Archie (for the record, I was always very pro-Betty, but that's not important right now). I also really loved the action/adventure Marvel comics.

Thor was my favorite of the Avengers. Mostly because he said cool things like:  

"WE'LL NEVER BE BEATEN! FOR WE ARE...THE AVENGERS!"

(By the way, the only time you should EVER use the Comic Sans font is in a comic book. There. I said it.)

Back to the Avengers. And specifically to Thor. The Mighty Thor. I loved Thor. He had the hammer. The cool Viking vibe. When I was in high school we were The Mighty Vikings. It like one big cosmic Thor Love-fest.

In fact, when Adam was three, I dressed him as Thor for Halloween. I did. I swear. (Excuse me while I go dig up some proof.....)

Ta-da!

Hey! Superheroes come in all sizes (and my son has since forgiven me). But that's not important right now.

As I got older, my comic book consumption diminished, but my love of all things Marvel did not. In the late 70's, I religiously watched Bill Bixby/Dr. Bruce Banner turn into Lou Ferrigno/The Incredible Hulk . (Who didn't?)

So back to Jonathan and The Avengers Movie Trailer....

1. I am thrilled that my 16 year old and I have such awesome common ground.
2. We are out-of-our-skin excited to see the film. In theaters everywhere on May 4th.

Were doubly excited that the makers of LEGO are also aboard the Avengers-train. Embrace the awesomeness:

And so is Target. This is seriously the cutest ad ever. Watch. And love.

We are definitely going to be following the Awesomeness that is The Avengers on Facebook. And counting down to May 4th. (Thanks, Disney Pictures!)

I don't know about you, but in our family, nerdiness does not skip a generation.

So, any other uber-nerds out there? I know there are. Come on. Talk to me.

Doorknobs and the Human Condition

We moved into this house in March of 2001. That was 11  years ago and let me tell you, our home has seen a lot of life since then.

To put it in better perspective, in March of 2001, Amy was a senior in high school. Adam was a freshman. Lucy was 7 and in second grade. Jonathan was 5 and not yet in school.

Amy and Adam have long since moved away and gotten on with their respective lives. Lucy is 18 now and in college. Jonathan is a sophomore in high school. (Does anyone else tell time by the ages of their kids?)

In all of that time, we have been living with the doorknobs that came with this house. In fact, we have never given them much thought. There were doors. They had knobs. You could open and close them. End of story.

I don't think the locks on the bathroom doors have ever really worked. We didn't care. In fact, we never, ever thought about it.

Yesterday, the painters had finished painting all of the doors inside the house. All eleven of them. Before yesterday, I couldn't have told you that there were eleven doors in our home.

But once they were painted, we noticed the knobs...

Please notice (like we did) the mismatched knobs. I couldn't have told you they were mismatched. I couldn't have even told you what color or shape they were. Until yesterday.

Eric and I headed over to the Home Depot to pick up some new knobs for our freshly painted doors. Did you even know the word "knob" is spelled with a "k" at the beginning? You learn stuff when you're doing home improvements, but that's not important right now.

This is the part that is crazy-making....

We spent one hour choosing new knobs. One. Full. Hour. Picking out an item we had not given any thought to before The Great Door Painting of 2012.

The old ones were even a little crusty. (Ew!) How could we not have noticed??

We came home with our prize(s) and set to work installing the knobs. (When I say "we," I mean Eric. I just stood around and pointed and fussed more than actually doing any work, but again, that's not important right now.)

When the new doorknobs were installed (on all eleven doors!) we celebrated and raved about the ease of opening and closing and practiced locking each one and patted ourselves on the back for being so clever and having such great taste in doorknobs.

Look! Shiny! And round! And they lock! We were downright giddy with our new shiny, round, locking knobs...   

that we had not given a thought to for ELEVEN YEARS.

At least with my kids, they have grown and changed and so help me mark the passage of time. The doors, not so much.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go lock the door.

(If you have a similar story, please share. I'd hate to think we were the only ones with this kind of crazy.)

Gratuitous Photos of My Four Kids

All my creative energy is going into my kitchen remodel. Well, most of it.

Another high percentage of my creative energy is going into designing sets and costumes for the high school production of Grease (Jonathan will be playing the role of Sonny).

And did I mention that we've torn up the downstairs bathroom? Probably not, because I'm kind enough to spare the internet from enjoying photos of my discarded toilet in the side yard and my bombed-out-looking-bathroom. You're welcome.

All that to say this: I'm having trouble stringing two words together to make a sentence because my right brain has taken charge over my entire being and is diverting all energy to sets, costumes, kitchen, and bath (not necessarily in that order).

And did I mention that I'm mostly "visual?"

So I thought I'd just post some photos of my kids today.

1. Because they make me happy.
2. Because these photos perfectly captured their relationships and personalities.
3. Because I can. ;-)

Lucy & Adam. He was seven when she was born and that was upsetting to him for a while.

He's obviously over it.

Now it's like they share a brain.

Amy Kikita really, really wanted her Ruby-Slippers-on-Crack in the photos.

I told her she didn't have to be so dramatic.

That's my girl!

Theirs is the perfect love/hate sibling relationship.

My girls, in spite of the 10 year age difference, are friends. That makes me happy.

Jonathan and Adam are working hard to perfect their smolder.

But, I like their happy faces better.

These two sometimes act like they're twins.

Lucy just really, really wanted her harlequin tights to be documented.

I really, really miss having Adam around.

Because he always makes us laugh.

And laugh.

Jonathan and Amy. He's sixteen. She's twenty-eight. But they share a love for Battlestar Gallactica and Dr. Who. Go figure.

I love that they were all wearing red and black and looked all color-coordinated. (It was Christmas.)

I love when they are all together and making each other laugh.

They are all so different and yet so very much alike. One thing I know for sure, when they smile....I can't deny any of them.

Thanks for your attention. Now it's back to my kitchen and bathroom and Greasers and Pink Ladies. I may yet post photos of my discarded toilet, but that's not important right now. ;-)

The Biggest Insult

My kids are generally pretty nice to each other. Of course, there are the occasional sibling fights that crop up when someone's in a foul mood or has had a bad day and chooses to take it out on those closest to them.

For the most part, they get along great and are friends. The exception being that the older ones would take advantage of the gulibility of the younger ones and taunt them whenever they had the chance. They're still doing this (but that's not important right now).

This usually happened at the dinner table and it went something like this:

• One of the two younger ones, usually Jonathan, tells some sort of joke.
• One of the other siblings: "That's not funny."

This became the biggest insult in our home... for years. "That's not funny," or even worse, "You're not funny."

The highest praise in our family is to get a laugh. So then, the highest goal (especially at dinner time) became to make the other siblings think something was funny. Extra points if you could make them accidentally spit food or pass a liquid through their nose. (I know. Terrible mother. Shut up.)

Believe me, this can be a tough crowd.

Once the Biggest Insult was out there, the un-funny one, sometimes Lucy, but most of the time, Jonathan would kind of do an emotional retreat and come out swinging the next time.

This scene repeated itself over and over on through the years and on many occasions. But, as Nietzsche once famously stated, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." This has been proven true in our quest for the dinner table laugh.

Fast forward to present day. My kids have been hanging with friends and playing Improvisation games for a long time now - it's what all the cool homeschool kids were doing, at least at our house. As an aside, I think each of them has an extremely well-developed sense of humor. I know I'm the mom here, but I promise, it's true.

A couple of years ago, Adam began teaching an Improv class at their high school. Lucy did it last year and this year, Jon collected a group of students to perform as a fundraiser for their drama program.

I know he's my son and everything, but I can genuinely say this with no equivocation: HE. IS. FUNNY.

I guess all that dinner table abuse really paid off. ;-)

For the love of Belle - Beauty and the Beast in 3D

When my daughter, Amy Kikita was young, she was completely enamored with The Little Mermaid, as probably most 7 year olds were at the time. Ariel was spunky for a princess and went after what she wanted. I think she identified with those qualities.

Years later, Disney gave us Beauty and the Beast and when it was available on VHS, we promptly procured a copy and our sweet Lucy had found that Belle was a princess who had qualities she could admire.

My mom calls Lucy, "La Bella Lucy." And our Master Teacher throughout our homeschool years always called her "Lucy Belle." Coincidence?

I think not.

We had seen the stage show, Beauty and the Beast last year, but last week I was invited by Disney Pictures to the El Capitan Theater in Hollywood to experience Disney's Beauty and the Beast in 3D and I couldn't have stopped Lucy from joining me if I had wanted to. She was out-of-her-skin excited with the prospect of finally seeing the drama played out on the big screen. Not to mention that we just both happen to love being on Hollywood's Walk of Fame.

Check out the look on her face. Can't you just see her excitement?

Because it was Disney, and because it was at the El Capitan, we were treated to an amazing organist who played every song from the movie as we all took our places. (Totally made me happy.)

Then, Belle and the Beast came out to dance and welcome the audience along with canon blasts of rose petals. (Oh, yes!)

We got to don our 3D glasses, which I'm starting to kind of like. (I know. Shut up.)

And were treated to the new Disney short Tangled Ever After - The Rings, which was absolutely hysterical. Here's a preview:

When the movie began, we quietly sang along to each familiar song and even though we knew the movie by heart, decided that it was absolutely worth seeing it on the big screen. (The Tangled Ever After short was seriously laugh-out-loud funny. Almost worth the price of admission, but that's not important right now.)

And because I'm a big, sentimental uber-geek, I sat there thinking how cool it was to be sitting with a fully grown-up Miss Lucy Belle and enjoying that piece of her childhood as it came to life before us. And, okay...I might have wiped away a tear or two. (But I'll deny it if you tell anyone.)

I encourage you, if you've only seen the small screen version of Beauty and the Beast, or haven't seen it in all its glory, to find a theater playing Beauty and the Beast in 3D in your own town. It's playing in selected theaters opening this coming weekend, January 13th and runs through February 2nd. I swear you don't want to miss it.

And then, because the story is set in France....we ate crepes...

...and we lived happily ever after. ;-)

Did you see Beauty and the Beast back in the day? Are you planning on seeing it again this time around? Tell me.

{Disclosure: Disney Pictures invited us to the pre-screening of Beauty and the Beast 3D. The opinions about the show are my own and the crepes were delicious, but that's not important right now.}

Everything I wished for...

Happy New Year, everyone!

I know some of you are wondering what happened with the Dark Christmas Tree. 

Here's the story:

My son, Adam flew in from the Bay Area at the crack of dawn, landing at around 7:30 AM on Christmas eve. Lucy and Jonathan went to pick him up at the airport while Eric and I finished up the last minute touches around here. Or maybe we just slept in, but that's not important right now. ;-)

And they were all exhausted so they napped for most of the day which was fine by me. We had an amazing NocheBuena celebration at my sister, Alina's house. Everything was so beautiful and festive and everyone was so happy. (We also did a photobooth thing again which I'll share with you later.)

In short, a good time was had by all.

We didn't get home until about 11pm. It was then that we busted out the Créme de Vie and cranked up the Christmas music and decorated our own tree and put out the presents and set the table for breakfast.

Christmas morning felt pretty magical and I think we all felt it. (I made them put the lights on the tree in a swirling light pattern. You can see it if you squint. I kind of loved it. A lot.)

We had an absolute feast on Christmas morning that included quiche, fresh fruit, monkey bread and my best friend, Pam's Pamagranate Jelly.

Seriously, the house went from plain to spectacular fabulous magical (=D) overnight.

And as we leisurely had breakfast and opened gifts... (lots and lots of gifts. Thanks, guys!)

I felt absolutely content. We had a wonderful time together and all 6 of us were in the same area code. 

Which is all I really wanted for Christmas anyway. 

Just Jon

I was hoping to have something profound to say about my youngest son, Jonathan turning 16 today. I wanted to compare and contrast the kid he was,

to the man he's become.

I wanted to write about what a decent person he's grown up to be. I wanted to tell you about the many qualities that he's developed that make him a great guy. I'm trying to take a step back and take myself out of the equation and assess him as objectively as possible (although I'd love to take credit for how awesome he turned out, but that's not important right now).

As I observe my youngest today on his 16th birthday, here's what I know for sure:

1. Jonathan is his own person. 
2. He is a wonderful friend.
3. He has a caring heart.
4. He's got a highly developed sense of humor.
5. He is thoughtful.
6. He is tough.
7. He is talented.
8. And humble.
9. He's a natural born leader.
10. He's comfortable in his own skin.
11. Jonathan is the kind of guy that friends call when they need something.
12. He is respected by his peers and by the adults in his life.
13. He is compassionate.
14. He is sensitive.
15. He is smart.
16. He has big thoughts.

When you meet Jonathan and get to know him, you will eventually detect all those qualities, but like everyone else in his life, you will say, "That's just Jon."

And that's the highest compliment of all. 

Happy birthday, my son. I love you MORE.

(NOTE: The photo of Jon today was taken by his talented photographer friend, Chase Miller.)

The Dark Christmas Tree

It's December the 24th and my Christmas tree is finally up. But there are no ornaments on it.

My friends tease me because I don't like to decorate my home for Christmas very early in the month of December. In the Christmases of my youth, we would always wait until Christmas eve to decorate the tree. There's nothing like feeling the season when you're hanging ornaments, listening to carols, sipping creme de vie and smelling the intoxicating smell of the pork roasting all day in all of the garlicky goodness that is our Cuban Nochebuena.

So I like to wait. It's not that I don't love Christmas. I totally do. I love everything about it. 

And it's not like I haven't been busy. I finished all my shopping by the first week of December (thank you, Cyber Monday). 

We (by "we," I mean Lucy) have made vats of creme de vie. It's all been bottled and tagged and delivered to our friends. This includes my dearest Desi Arnaz Jr. (see photo below). *sigh*

(I'm kind of in love with my tags this year, but that's not important right now.)

This past week I have been busy hanging our Christmas stockings, by the chimney with care, of course. ;-)

I have already given my girls their traditional matching Christmas PJs.

This week I also stocked my hutch with my favorite Christmas dishes.

We (again, by "we," I mean Lucy) have made countless Peanut Butter Kiss Cookies. (That also means we have eaten countless Peanut Butter Kiss Cookies, but that's not important right now.)

I edited and packaged our annual Christmas video and a family keepsake photo album of the highlights of everyone's year. They are all wrapped, tagged, and ready to give to the rest of the family tonight at our annual Nochebuena celebration.

The kids made our annual run to Porto's already this morning. (25 tamales, 25 croquetas de jamón, 25 pastelitos de guayaba, 25 pastelitos de coco, 25 pastelitos de guayaba y queso, 4 loaves of Cuban bread, a dozen papas rellenas, and some steak sandwiches to get us through the day. =D)

But it's already noon on Christmas Eve, and my Christmas tree is still not decorated. And I'm okay with that.

Let me explain. My son, Adam, just got home today. Happily, he'll be with us for the rest of the week. He arrived on the o-dark-hundred flight from San Francisco and barely slept last night. He's here and napping now.

He was so looking forward to coming home for Christmas and he wouldn't be putting up a Christmas tree in his world. And so, I am completely content to wait with that dark tree in my living room.

When Adam wakes up from his nap, we will hang the ornaments, listen to Christmas Carols, sip some creme de vie, and enjoy the intoxicating smell of the garlicky goodness that is our Cuban Nochebuena.

I'll be reminded of the Christmases of my childhood and we will have made a memory. Isn't that what Christmas is all about?

Feliz Navidad, my friends!