Whole Roast Chicken - Pollo Asado

Lost In Translation

My son, Adam is a handsome guy. (Okay, I know I’m his mom and all that, but I am being truly objective here. Shut up.) And even though he’s not fluent in Spanish, he can defend himself pretty well for the most part.

So he was visiting my mom (his grandmother) the other day. She speaks as much English as he does Spanish. (Ay Dios mio!)

Adam to me via text: What does ‘mono’ mean?

Me in reply: Monkey.

Adam: Doesn’t ‘pollo’ mean chicken?

Me: Yes. Why do you ask?

Adam: I think she’s insulting me.

Me: She’s not insulting you. Take whatever she’s saying as a complement.

Adam: She called me a monkey and then said I was chicken.

I know there’s been something completely lost in translation, so I call my mom and ask what it was that she said to Adam.

My mom: “Nada. Lo encontre muy mono y le dije que esta hecho un pollo.”

I clarify: “Adam, she thinks you’re handsome and you look great.”

Adam: “Damn Cubans.”

Me: “I’ll just take that as a complement.” =D

Pollo Asado (Roast Chicken)

2- 4 lb. Roasting chickens
Freshly ground salt and pepper
Ground cumin
Ground thyme
1 bunch of fresh thyme
2 large heads of garlic, cut in half, cross-wise
2 lemons – cut in half
4 Tbsp. Melted butter
2 large red onions, sliced

(Instructions are for one, but I always make two)

1) Preheat the oven to 425 degrees.

2) Remove the guts (giblets and such) from the cavity and rinse the chicken inside and out.

3) Pat the outside completely dry.

4) Liberally salt and pepper the inside of the cavity.

5) Liberally sprinkle the ground cumin and ground thyme also inside the cavity.

6) Stuff the cavity with a bunch of the fresh thyme, all of the cross-wise sliced head of garlic, and both halves of the lemon. (Yes, just fearlessly shove them in there!)

7) Brush the outside of the chicken with the melted butter and sprinkle again with salt, pepper, thyme and cumin.

8) You can tie the legs together at this point if you prefer, with kitchen string.

9) Place chicken on a foil-lined pan that’s been scattered with the onion slices.

10) Roast the chicken for about 1 and 1/2 hours. The juices should run clear when it’s done.

11) Remove to a warmed serving dish and cover with foil.

12) I like to serve it with smashed red roasted potatoes.

13) Here’s an added bonus, when the chicken has been carved, dig into the cavity, past the lemons until you find the garlic and thyme. Butter a piece of bread and carefully spread the roasted garlic and thyme over the bread.